Hearts who sing out loud
by layalatania
Summary: They both had no idea the weight of the world, all they knew as that each of them was on the precipice of destruction and had to admit it both thrilled and terrified them. Nor the understanding of selfishness, selflessness and forgiveness.
1. 2am

**Notice: There have been slight changes to this chapter only for style and grammar purposes it does not in any way change the story... to my knowledge (at least I hope...)**

**Hello welcome, to my newest story. Truly hope you guys enjoy this it sort of just came to me. This story is a bit more literary than some may like and the lives of the characters will be from the mind sight of teenagers as I viewed them during my teenage years. Not to be mistaken as condescending it just I feel there is lack of unique high school stories that don't portray the generic fundamentals- especially from some that have an idealized view of high school usually from having little experience in it. My portrayal of high school is based on my individual experience and pure imagination. To finish of the ramble- please enjoy!**

**"Breathe (2 AM)"**

_2 AM and she calls me 'cause I'm still awake,_  
><em>"Can you help me unravel my latest mistake?,<em>  
><em>I don't love him. Winter just wasn't my season"<em>  
><em>Yeah we walk through the doors, so accusing their eyes<em>  
><em>Like they have any right at all to criticize,<em>  
><em>Hypocrites. You're all here for the very same reason<em>

_'Cause you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable_  
><em>And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table<em>  
><em>No one can find the rewind button, girl.<em>  
><em>So cradle your head in your hands<em>  
><em>And breathe... just breathe,<em>  
><em>Oh breathe, just breathe<em>

He made her cry once, and compared to every time he made her laugh, or even made her frown the stir of her eyebrows would forever be etched into his mind. Riding away under the heat of the summer a lump burbled through his chest. The stirring in his immature heart crooning; his tongue running dry and tasteless. The tears she shed never falling until the car shifted across a corner, the glint of the sun shining on her face, blacking her out into a shadow; within hapless seconds she was gone.

Sitting in the backseat listening the bubble of his mother's friction filled voice describing the lovely tranquility of Tennessee, he promised to remember how helpless she looked pulling her hat over her face rubbing her eyes furiously as her small body shook.

Arriving in Tennessee was nothing close to enjoyable, the city desolate beyond the despondent snicker of mutant donkey-horses, and ugly warped alpacas chewing on mud-grass and baking in the heat. Hoagie didn't get to watch a lot of television apparently it corrupted a young boys mind about justice. Instead he spent his mornings in the barn, heralding the sheep outside after their meal, walking the horses down to the wide pasture. Then off to school. Eight hours of education under the old cobble building constructed from the thirties, with a bareness of soft light enough to always leave the windows open but never turn the archaic air conditioner on. After he would walk three miles down the dirt path to the local grocers, known for its prominence of the bartering system, stacking boxes of bush bake beans, and corn mill until dusk. Sister Erin Mcgennis, a sweet Mormon woman would drive him home to wrangle up the heifers as she put it. As was his life for a number of years, and even with the inclusion of his good ol' truck he still stuck to the safety of the mundane wrangling up those heifers for good old Sister Erin, or how she wished to be called Sissy:

_"Hogarth now you go on'a and call me Big Sissy ol'right. I ain't that old child. So boy how was yer day, you've been stayin away from that Barbra Jankin's them Jankin's ain't no good let me tell ya. Naw... it ain't good ta gossip. Ain't no good ta gossip ya hear."_

_"Yes Mrs. Mcgennis."_

_"Boy didn't I tell you call Me Sissy!"_

_"Yeah, yeah...yeah. Sissy."_

Despite the accommodation of sweet Sister Erin, the unnerving kindness of his new father; Hoagies world was bread crumbs ready to fall and yet no trail to follow.

In the heady summers, and the approaching harvest time, brunt strength was a necessity, and he seemed to be born for such a design. At the sight of his height his new father praised him, Tommie envied him for the attention, and his mother kept stuffing his plate with black-eyed peas and mustard greens. He was becoming a well off tall, strong, handsome youth. Seventy seven inches of height that gingerly stretched the awkward adolescent fat into, favorable farm hand frame. He particularly didn't like the new addition of adulthood looming, but like all things he slowly came to accept the fact he wasn't a child anymore or the fact he now had to remember to duck when he entered and exited a room.

Four years after the move Hoagie broke his arm trying to drive a Chevy truck back from Nashville to Virginia. He ended up in the hospital a seventy-six miles from the house somewhere in Who-knows-where Virginia barely on the outskirts of a homely little plagued city known for its biggest bottle of curd milk. His reasoning, beyond all to finally work up the courage and see dear old Grammy. A little while before he peddled his hand-me-down bicycle he kept of his fathers down to the end of the property out of the gate and into the highway successfully ridding three heat stricken drivers into the wide watery barrel ditches . Two nights after arriving in his new brick paneled little cottage home he in anxious pacing found himself lost out in the woods of the neighboring acres so angry at the happenings he never felt the fear of returning to that cottage he would forever call home. Note that his father in punishment just offered him a bowl of freshly home-made ice cream after the little scare and a boring anecdote of his rambunctious youth.

He hated his father, his new father, A kindly man as much as he hated himself. He felt the need to live no longer promising as it was in his youth; the days of sunshine and rainbow monkeys was long since gone.

When Hoagie broke his arm he thought the world had came to an end. To him that was excitement, that was living. The Chevy skidded under his heavy steel toe boots unable to stop completely from colliding into the solid frame of a barb wire fence thinly avoiding a flock of wild pigs. His vision glared, the burning smell of rubber extending up his nose, the white walls of smoke draining into the air filters, blood dribbled down his forehead, pellets of glass sprinkled on his skin. And even in the thinly veiled hell, he felt nothing at all but the need to keep driving home. How poor he looked, foot still revved onto the engine, eyes asunder looking into blank vastness.

This incident was of the only he had ever received punishment for. His father's bereavement not aimed at his stupidity but at Hoagie's need to free himself of the rest of the world. Although his mother's anguish did little to push Hoagie's heart, it did become the precipice of his parents slippery slope into misery. Within a few months hatred and frustration became a ticking bomb strapped on their chest, within a few years the once quaint household became a scrutiny for malice and to Hoagie's contradicting heart it felt so good to see fragile peace crumble, but so painful to watch his mother cry, his brother shout, and even his father complete ignorance begin to simmer.

Every day he shined his boots, the source of his accident. A texture of heavy leather snapped his ankle completely. An early present for his upcoming birthday to go with his car was his new father's excuse, although Hoagie couldn't complain, his shoes had become a fair bit restricting since his growth spurt and in the Nashville terrain flippancy was a no' go . Unable to complain for he much prefer the solace of a pair of working boots than flimsy sneakers to go handle a flank of boisterous stalk cows; and he just like a pair of shoes also changed and conformed.

Even after five years, he recalled the silliness of trying to escape the monotony. Although Hoagie wished he waited at least one more year to hold the facade in place- at least so he wouldn't have to hear the weak sobs of mom, and the discontent of his moody brother. One more year he wouldn't have to face the world that in his youth he believed would never grow old. It never occurred to him as he drove down through the slumbering streets of Virginia how much the world changed.

At five am, he noted the same houses and on the mailbox the same surnames he walked past everyday in his childhood- _Sanban...Dickson...Mckenzie...Drivolsky_ down the next street- _Uno...Devine...Fulbright, _beyond them on the last street before gauging into the small tole booth of the highway two handily crafted mailbox- _Beetles _and _Lincoln. _The two mailboxes tucked quaint against each other on the curb, the Lincoln a particularly older house, handcrafted mailbox laid three dainty hand prints of the three not so little children who once dwell in the house.

He wanted to hold onto the memory, the giddiness of her eyes as she tried vainly to hide under the safety of her hat, looking cavalier leaning on the same mailbox, flicking through envelopes for her magazine subscription as to keep her deviant cheerfulness in check as the neighborhood slowly came alive.

The way he and she, and the two others, Wally and Kuki would sit up in their tree. He doodling far away mechanisms onto blueprint paper, Wally beating the kanoodles out of the video controller frustration from his defeat by the computer operating control. Kuki leaning out the door frame matching clips to the crazy fabrics of her new clothing style. Abby singing a diddy in french as she worked on a homework assignment. Nigel's room wistfully empty moving along with such cadence it was easy to forget he wasn't their- but he also returned, and on much better terms, for a much nobler cause, so easily forgiven. Hoagie got the call from Kuki-

"_Hoagie he's back He's home."_

"_Well Kooks... I'm in Tennessee."_

That was the last call he received from Kuki, and the only one he ever received. He imagined Wally felt much too betrayed and Abigail much to afraid of changing- she was the oldest after all, the one expected to be resolute and unflappable. Leaning out on the side of his pickup truck window, his hand crafted down the side of the dented door frame fixated at memorizing the diameter of the imperfection through mere touch alone. His car sat outside the curb for fifteen minutes waiting as she did diligently for years before. Always the one waiting for the world to slow down for her to catch up and never the one being waited for.

He tried to create glimpses of her from past memories. Would she be wearing glasses again, braces maybe- she did have a delinquent love for sweets. What changes in five years? The night before he caught sight of Kuki, he never realized how small and fragile she looked then. Her eyes unusually tired but happy and caressing, her fingers waving down to the tinted windows of an unknown car. She didn't catch a glimpse of him although she turned to impede upon his house with a measured frown before disappearing into her home.

Sitting in his car on the lot he hoped to catch a glimpse of a long french braid but she never came out, and Hoagie didn't understand if he was happy or relieved at the gross premonition of what life would surely be like. Everyone changes, no one can remain the same for too long before becoming incompetent and useless he mused. Taking his foot of the park he shifted the vehicle into gear, turning the radio on and zooming past the barking little mutts perturbed by the powerful stir of his engine.

* * *

><p>Two a.m, Abby sat at the dinner table teasing a marble cowbell statue with her finger, liking the shuddering tinkering noise it made as the diadem resounded against the hallow walls. A plate of gram cracker, peanut butter, and watermelon from the fridge being slowly picked at as she contemplated recent developments. In the morning she would have to deliver her paper first hand to Mr. Laurel, <em>The dedication of misogynist to the misery of life <em>for her report of a unique personal characteristic which is typically invoked in literature, a paper she still hasn't half tried to accomplish, but felt no fear in its bearing. No, her mind was more preoccupied on another hair tearing event. The Gilligan house was being occupied. Although she hoped it would once again be an up incoming couple ready to settle down for some child-making or an elderly old widow and her three grand kids taking up quarters for a few years. But she knew better, just her sense of ominous approaching reared in the truth. Her deduction skills never failing before informed Abby of a tragic inevitable happening. He was returning back to the once empty house. Hoagie Gilligan was on his way home.

It wouldn't be long before the news spread, her father forcing her to make an apple pie for the returners and bring the domestic bake good to their doorstep the old fashioned way. A big cheesy grimace on her face, the pie shaking on her arm, "Hears. yo. Pie. Ma'am." and of the course the pudgy little woman would grab up the plate quickly yell up the stairs for the two little balloon boys to come down and say hello, and usher Abby up to the boys room for a few minutes of awkward catch up- pretending not to announce true feelings of regret before someone misinterprets and winds up hurt and angry. With frank words of "I miss you," scattered everywhere.

Abby decided then, she knew nothing and would say nothing, and instead let the world revolve in the safety of her seclusion of the dining room, under the glowing lights slipping through from the kitchen, all alone in a house that felt more like a museum than a place to grow and succeed.

Her father stayed again overnight at the hospital an outbreak of chicken pox immediate in the area left his hands tied. Her brother who she rarely spoke to was working on his fifth kid, busy with downsizing into a small shelf-house, than their previous loft due to financial burdens. Her sister off to college in full groove of a rhetoric class and a zealous feminist movement hardly ever called. Her mother... not worth thinking about in the labyrinth of the lonely night.

Abby's head fell into her palms, fingers smoothing across her hairline holding in the exhausting headache taking over her mind. A coldness from the table top developed as she let her head rest on the surface, eyes unable to close for sleep. New developments to cruel to let her mind rest.

Digging into the cupboard she retrieved a bottle of honey, letting the lathery substance drip from the nozzle onto the silver spoon, remembering it to be a natural sedative;soon she drank the two teaspoons remarking in the pungent taste before replacing her ruminations for frantic pacing. It wasn't until four fifty, after writing her paper; she finally pent up the energy to go scramble into her bedsheets and get a good hour and half asleep before preparing for school.

Crawling into her sheets an anxiousness settled in her heart at the unfamiliar sound of an engine rearing to life outside her window. She dared not look in fear her hopes would be shattered under the pretense of her hallucinogenic mind cruel to cater her true desires, but the world was never kind to Abby, and so instead she laid in bed, shut her mind off refusing to acknowledge their was at least one person still waiting for her to fall in time with the rest of the world.

_There's a light at each end of this tunnel,  
>You shout 'cause you're just as far in as you'll ever be out<br>And these mistakes you've made, you'll just make them again  
>If you'd only try turning around.<em>

_2 AM and I'm still awake, writing a song_  
><em>If I get it all down on paper, it's no longer inside of me,<em>  
><em>Threatening the life it belongs to<em>  
><em>And I feel like I'm naked in front of the crowd<em>  
><em>Cause these words are my diary, screaming out loud<em>  
><em>And I know that you'll use them, however you want to<em>

* * *

><p><strong>Thank you guys who decided to read this it makes me incredibly happy. I hope you enjoyed the chapter and please if there are any questions, critics, concerns or comments anyone wishes to makes please don't hesitate it will make me smile. Guys have a wonderful night, day, mid-morning, afternoon, evening until the next update. <strong>

**P.S the song is Breathe (2 am) by Anna Nalick beautiful song in my opinion.**


	2. Change

**Again there have been some slight changes to this chapter as well, in forehand please forgive my lack of updating, no excuses guys... but please do enjoy! I recommend reading it for there is a lot more development in Abby and Wally's relationship than the previous at least in my opinion.**

Abby woke in a grog, a sudden stir stabbing at her heart as she looked at the alarm clock. Clanking her teeth together she thanked the lord, it was only a little after six. Stepping out of bed the world felt wobbly. She could feel the etching of a headache beginning at the front of her skull. Somewhere deep inside of herself she wished there was still someone who cared to gently shake her awake, someone to call her in the morning and invite her table, but she is use to the quiet now so the voice quiets.

Her visions swimming accompanying the sourly pounding of drums in her head; she disdained this feeling most- the tunnel vision as her eyes tried to focus from the fuzziness surrounding her sight. Black spots crossing into a haze before it focused back in at the sight of day light streaming through her window.

Would it be selfish to whimper out for held?

Getting out of her stupor Abby carelessly slips on a pair on denim shorts before pulling her messy half-wet hair to the back of her head. She felt like crap she imagined she probably looks like crap too, her empty stomach lurching for food and one of her oh so valuable contacts falling out of her eye again. Heading into the bathroom she unsuccessfully set her mass of curls into a low ponytail, small ringlets falling out of the tail and framing her face. She opened a new pack of prescription contacts she was down to her last three she reasoned. She stole a few minutes stabbing herself in the eye before getting the contact in. Sighing she finished dressing. Struggling on a fitted shirt with a pair of converse she headed downstairs, her mind still buzzing and glazed.

Breakfast went pretty much like the days before minus the additional guest of glum and flopping tummy syndrome. In a peculiar but comfortable silence she dined; a cold glass of water, a couple apple slices and a granola bar. Abby always found amusement in the fact people assumed she was a health nut due to her choice of consumption. In all honest truth her cooking skills were non existent. Due to a mixture of hesitance and laziness she rarely attempted to cook or bake anything that didn't have instructions written on the box. Yep. She was ready for the college life meal plan definitely included.

Finishing her meal she contemplated on recent developments. Her father still hadn't returned for the morning, and freaking Wally jammed her Ipod the night before-there went her protection from the masses. For a moment her mind turned sour, but her chiding was quickly interrupted by vibrations of the home phone. Any close friends of Abby knew she had trouble answering her cell phone, always misplacing and or simply ignoring it completely. Of those close friends their were very few. Now in recent years the numbers were dwindling. Exiting the bar table she nimbly grabbed for the phone. A devilish whisper fueled her hesitance: what if it was him?

Placing the phone back on the hook, her shoulders slumped onto the walls as an infuriating ache thrilled up her spine. Her body shuttered, and the insides of her head shook. She couldn't handle any more change. Mindlessly Abby allowed the tumbling rings to resonate through the empty house. The pain was becoming unbearable, the world unbearable- she just wanted out- no doctor, no shrinks, no medicine or dreams- just complete quiet. The buzzing phone continued riling up her brain.

She almost cried. Almost...

Her head burned furiously the pain so excruciating it set a horrible numbness to her heart. _I don't want this kind of pain, I don't want to be here._ She muffled out the simmering heartache too focused on the the exploding pressure growing more frigid in her brain. Sliding to the ground the coldness of the floor settled the burn. Her hands wrapped into her hair, her face tucked into her knees and the heaves like whispers escaped deftly into the air. She was breathing but no air was entering her lungs. As if drowning in her own anxiety Abby cradled her heartache soaking in the vulnerable sorrow.

"_Abbs.." _The shuffling around her was non-existent. _"Abbs..." _She just wanted to shut off all the sounds, close out all the voices whispering, shouting, delegating her name. "Abby!"

"_Stop talking!" _Her mind cried. Her hands wrenching down against her head canceled out the pain her body was inflicting from within.

Hands pried her own from her head. Watchful green eyes stared into empty black fear smothered onto their brow. "Abby, wot are y'doin'?" Glazed eyes cleared to a focus, the green too vernal made the the urge to look away tangent. Smooth hands cradled her jaw forcing her eyes onto his, his head falling onto hers. The cover of blond tickled her nose as sweat from his fear and her paranoia caused an uncomfortable sensation to form at their foreheads. "Shit. Abby you scared the hell out of me." His hand trembled against her skin, his lip twitching into relief. When had his hands gotten so large?

She looked up at him, "Wally."

He heaved fingers quivering terribly against her chin"Don'tcha eva' do that again!" His eyes bled with anger as his voiced rasped. But as suddenly as the anger fumed it dissipated into a soft shield of relief. Standing he stretched himself up to full height. "Oi get of the floor." Wally called lacing his fingers around her wrist and pulling Abby from her pathetic heap. She staggered up pathetically like a baby deer, vulnerable and akward.

She stumbled only lightly before setting the pace but he grabbed her hand, it delicate in his own as he lead her out of the house. He didn't want her to go by herself, she didn't have a need to be alone anymore.

He blushed firmly as she turned her speculative Abby-ish glance; muttering incoherent words under his breath, "Stupid chick." Pulling her through the opening of the threshold they both welcomed the bright length of sunshine overflowing from the treetops.

"It feels like a hundred years of rain." She looked out into the brightness; a shaky whisper of her raspy voice, "and then the sun comes out."

"Oi stop talking crazy stuff." He huffed at her grinning form. "Come on Mrs. Valedictorian you don't want people getting' da wrong impression." He smirked holding their entangled hands together up for her to see.

At the moment irritation trumped doubt, "Boy, stop being stupid and let me lock the doh'." Abby whispered under her breath, she hesitantly untangled their fingers before fishing out her keys she hesitated. Taking one quick sweep of the house picking up her wallet, backpack and one swift kick of her foot shut the door close.

"Aaaaabbbbbbbbbbbyyyyyyyyy!"

She gave the lanky little blonde a pointed look, "What? And dis better not be about no money to buy food. And donchu dare puppy dog me boy. You just broke my Ipod!"

"What've I ap-ol-gu-i-ze?" He was resorting to begging. "Come on Abby. Please. I'm a starving teenager! A growing boy. You-you...you home-wrecker!" He squeaked out like a ruffled peacock. Fingers fist into his jacket as his flushed face huffed, wild hair cow lick and all stood on edge. There was something adorable awkward about a teenage Wally, a boy who seemed to never grow up.

_A hundred years of rain, a hundred years of tears._

Giggles escaped her, a laughing fit so hard her body crumpled over tears ebbing at her cheeks and huffs and wheezes exchanging every few seconds. Her laugh so sightly it caused a red blemish to grow even more on Wally's face. "Eh stop acting like a stupid girl." She sobered up to send him a pathetic glare before she broke into a fit of laughter again.

He was happy to make her happy; anything, even his own pathetic attempt to abstract her mind from the knowing was enough. Even if it cost a bit of his own dignity, scratch that all of his dignity.

_And when sorrow has stretched the world thin the sun shall shine again._

Abby his friend, the girl next door was held a deep place in his heart. She wasn't like Kuki a summer love an on and off string of fragile friendships. But she was there, always there, unchanging. The years hadn't been all that kind to Wally. He had got a little head way in junior high the esteem captain of the football team the gallant five foot seven quarter back of all muscle. By sophomore year barely had the tangent to snag a spot on varsity by junior year he could hardly hold on to a position. He was after all a small five foot seven defensive end who was the size of a pretzel with a scrappy complex. He couldn't compete with genetics, no matter how much he worked out his sinewy muscle he never grew any bigger, but it was Abby who turned his frustration to studies and reunited his aggression into an affinity for algorithmic formula's and lab work.

She was his best friend, his confident, sibling, his sister he often reminded himself; sometimes a bit more than he should. She held every title of camaraderie he had to dish out. He loved her with an unadulterated passion, she was his longest sustainable friendship and when he was lost to the change of childhood it was she he took comfort in. He disdained the pale lacquer her skin developed; the blackness under her eyes, the limpness of her smiles. These were all things he wished to erase, and as much he didn't want to blame him there was only one person he could shoulder this transgression. He didn't know when but Wallaby Beetles had found Abigail Lincoln to be important to him, and in reason Hoagie Gilligan the epitome of an Ass and despicable worm not even worth being called a human being much less a friend.

_And should the world crumble..._

People change, the relationship of Wallaby Beetles and Hogarth Gilligan was of childhood fancy. A fair anecdote to dwell upon later in the blooming years of adulthood. Right now there were on the cuspid somewhere lodged in the middle of adolescence and maturity. Wally was choosing to step across the precipice.

He would now and forever hate the boy he once called best friend.

_A hundred years of rain, a hundred days of tears. And when sorrow has stretched the heart thin with weeping the sun shall rise and make the world smile again. And should the world crumble under its selfish salty tears the rain will still have heaven to lay about warm clouds._

* * *

><p>Kuki finally knew the feeling of the phrase school daze. Jumping over the door to Fanny's convertible she dared not look at the looming occupant of Thomas Gilligan leaning against an old pick up truck with the now trimmed Mrs. Gilligan fussing over his shirt collar. Silently she speculated if Tennessee had a secret Jenny Craig cult or the Gilligan's had been abducted and replaced by health conscious aliens- foreigners maybe. She just didn't have the time nor perception at the moment to correlate the pudgy faced rusty haired child with the well built dimpled mischievous boy in front of her.<p>

Kuki was for a better loss of words; Baffled.

Slamming her hand against the horn a fiery red head began to screech profanities. "Ehg. Tell yer' sister to hurry up!" Cried Fanny from the driver's side. "She takes all her bejesus freakin time!" Revving the engine Kuki ignored the normalcy of smoking tires and Fanny's insisted blaring against the steering wheel.

"Stupid! Stupid! Stupid! What the hell is her problem... What does she think I am a fuckin' cab driver, the- Who the Hell are you staring at!" Screeching once again she stood from her convertible leaning over the dash as she smashed her hands against the window. Showing pound for pound her ability to look like a rabid monkey and profane ass in one sitting. When Tommy finally turned away from the angry Irish girl; Fanny fell into her seat with a loud huff before shouting stupid boy and pounding on the car horn again.

Kuki turned apologetically to the boy knowing her friend could be a little unsubtle during her you know time of the month but she froze, once again stunned at the progression of five years.

He looked at her, a thin smile that was neither goofy or innocent tugged at his dimples. He wasn't Tommy Gilligan anymore- that boy in front of her leaning so suave against the truck, his legs like tree trunks and eyes like water glittered in such a mischievous way that Kuki's heart began to stutter.

"Whad' are you looking at?" Mushi questioned in a cold meticulous tone. Standing beside her leaning in the same precarious cartoon fashion; rump lifted in the air body twisted with her face invading Kuki's own. Her head tilted down to stare at her sister's blushing face. She looked out into the Gilligan's yard. "Well..." Flicking non-existent dirt from her fingers, "puberty was really _generous _to someone." Kuki averted her eyes at this point feeling the boy turn to her. Mushi waved in a fake exuberance her gloss blue nails shimmering under the sunlight. "Tommy!" He smiled before nodding his head down in gracious bow the tuffs of brown hair falling against his cheek. Mushi turned at this point, "Well gotta to get going sis."

"Wait I thought you were riding with us?" Kuki questioned.

"Oh...!" Mushi exclaimed in fake belabored breathe. "Uhmm... no." She turned around eying Fanny one time before going down the drive. "Sandy is picking me up on his bike."

"Huh...Wait! D-does mom know?" Kuki cried latching onto her sisters wrist. Mushi glared icily at her sisters grasp flexing her fingers out to stare at the glimmering reflection of her nails.

In a slow unimpressed voice, "Speak of the Devil" Mushi replied her eyes still fixed on her spaced hands as Genki Sanban strolled out of the house.

She cried out in a creepy rendition of the voice Mushi had just greeted Tommy, "Martha! Oh my is that Hoagie!"

Kuki looked out towards her mother's shrill voice. Mushi's hand slithering out of her own. She stunned did not hear the blasting curses of Fanny praying ill will on her sister nor the tell-tale sound of her sister adjusting onto the back of a trash-heap she hoped was a motorcycle.

_Vrrrrrrrrrrrroooooommmm..._

_That Stupid girl! How dare she have me waitin' out here all day. Wait til' I get my hands on her! She's dead!_

_Vrmmm...Vrooooom..._

Kuki's eyes searched her neighbors yard. The house still its happy Easter color, the drive still paved in scratches in cricks, and yet everything else, it changed. Hoagie. It was really him. How he looked how she imagined him were not close to the same thing. The boy was handsome in an alluring way, manly but possessed a sobering air around him. Even from afar his height look intimidating and his eyes once so elated, genial trembled with a lack of passion. He looked so tired.

In the back of her mind past the point of anxious exertion Kuki found herself lost on one thought. She really needed to have an extended vacation in Tennessee and quick.

He didn't look at them, she knew he had to have heard them...well at least Fanny. But he didn't turn to look at them. Was he ashamed? Of them. Of himself. She didn't know. But she couldn't deny even from afar how much he grown. Regal and dressed in the nines. Hair untamed brushed at his shoulder the texture part stringy the other slightly curled. His brows thicker darker in color his hair shading out to a supple fawn she didn't know if was die of bleach from the hours out in the sun. He had a bit of side burn the color just slightly darker than the rest of his head. He wore simple pair of jeans and a long fitted shirt that curved over what clearly had developed into muscle. He was tall descriptively so with hands she would reason were larger than her own hand probably larger than her mom, dad and mushi's combined. Around his shoulder he was hugged in a light furred out raincoat. She couldn't decipher if it was merely for style or to block out the cold. Despite how much he grown; in that unadulterated light frightened when she whispered his name she never seen him look so much like a child.

"_Hoagie."_

He trembled.

**Hey guys sorry for the lack of an update in who knows how long. I've been having a horrible time finding inspiration for the Hoagie Abby pieces lately and lack there of since I haven't even attempted to update them, but I felt you guys deserved better and really wanted to get this out to you guys who have been generously supportive about this story and my other KND stories. I don't want to simply let this story fall to pieces and will try hard to update as I get inspiration.**

**Please forgive me if this chapter especially feels like I'm taunting you guys not really giving any Abby and Hoagie please forgive me, but my mind wrote this and all my fingers could do was listen. Trust guys that this is Abby and Hoagie pairing but like in real life there are scruples to every relationship and not everything is linear. Tee-hee.**

**On a side not I am planning on the guys who read Cafe A Laite I will be revamping out that story and rewriting and updating fairly soon. I wrote that story at a premature time in my life and wish to make it much more wonderful for you guys! So look out for any updates on that story so we can have a bunch more Abby and Hoagie stories we really don't have many! We need to make a coalition!**

If anyone is curious parts of Kuki's personality is inspired by Orihime from Bleach who is one of my favorite characters I feel she would be somewhat like her quirky, silly but definitely attune with the world more than people expect.

Mushi's personality is based of Azula from Avatar the Last Air Bender I feel like Mushi would grow up to be a little Azula; hopefully you guys like this characterization of both sisters.


	3. Unchanging

**Well its been quite a while, I assure some of you guys maybe upset that I have uploaded since freakin' I can't even remember, but its hear guys, I have no fear I have updated today! I felt somewhat inspired due to procrastination. I have finals soon so my brain is trying to relax. **

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><strong>A note chapter one and two have had changes one more for grammatical errors, two I feel if anyone wishes to read it is a lot better than the original and there is more exploration of Abby and Hoagie's relationship as well a little more depth on Kuki seeing Tommy and Hoagie... So I hope you guys read that and now on to chapter three, do enjoy!<strong>

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><strong>Warning this chapter has a bit more derogatory language than the last two so as not to offend there a bit of cursing just be forewarned if it offends you please forgive me it just feels corny to try and replace the words their saying without loosing the realism.<strong>

Nigel didn't to much like his peers, he could almost say he disliked them- almost for he didn't hate them surely not; he tended to believe he was a fair, just and uncorrupted individual. And yet there was an intense loathing fluttering around his heart ever since his return. He didn't fit in here. This world, this school wasn't exactly screaming Nigel Uno if anything it was slowly shunning him out. Everyday he felt more and more dislodged from the eyes of his peers. They didn't understand they couldn't even begin to remember what an importance is was that he left. That they forget him and live their lives. But no one ever truly forgets. They respond with their hesitant gazes and rig up a matrix in which they envision the would be Nigel Uno. But why was everyone so intent on creating this image of a new older Nigel Uno when he never changed at all.

He missed space, he missed the thrill of the Inter Galactic KND, the never aging race of adrenalin that entered his soul every time he rescued an alien interloper from the evil clutches of their adult counterpart. He was meant to be a hero his body begged for it everyday like a little druggie he found himself more and more contempt with the limitations of Earth. Here he had to grow old, grow distant and be remembered as all but a shadow. Out in space he could be a hero- a legacy.

But at least here, there was family... there was Rachel- and Kuki, Wally, Abby all his friends. But their friendship wasn't so even now if it was a friendship at all. He felt them among him but they trailed around, beside, in front and behind him like indifferent shadows. They remembered him as friend and yet no longer remembered him at all. He knew in their head they were teasing him about living like a child as they slowly became adults.

Were they the enemy, the poison? They smiled with a heavy benign force; beyond the scrunch of their brows he saw no warmth their eyes. Like pillars of statues they were frosting into an unchangeable mold. He hated it. Nigel didn't know if he wished to envy their ignorance or leer at their misgivings. He thought at least Abby, at least Rachel they would never change. And here it was in front of him the proof to it all.

Everyone was growing up, becoming- oh how he despised the words: adults.

He pulled his cap tighter on his head. Hating the frigid air that was too premature for the late summer. Closing the door to his old tin can Nigel adjusted his sun glasses. The glimmer of the sun pounding against the shades caused him to abruptly turn away. In the haze his eyes locked on the sight of blonde hair from the distance. Her form languid and happy rushed against him in her game of horseplay. She passed him her corduroy jacket gliding against the bare of his arm. Nigel felt a shock and then tremor she didn't notice; not enough to glance or send one her wretched apologetic glances. Too caught up in her game as she made a dash from the jeep onto the back of the wrestling Captain. Locking him up in a choke she pulled into he made a sound Nigel could only declare as a wretched gag before she nuzzled her head in a sickening way against Drivolsky's cheek. The friction of the two lovebirds nuzzling caused the wrestler 's hat to drift from his head on to the pave.

Reaching down with Rachel still housed on his back the two finally took notice of their single audience member. The two didn't know rather to embarrassed or uncomfortable they chose both in the face of a type cast stranger.

Everyone in school was rather immune to the violent display of affection Rachel and Drivolsky displayed as much as they were to Abby always one-uping the easy to rattle Wallabee Beetles so more of the time the two never felt a need to be self conscious of their rather childish actions. They were always fighting, always arguing with each other since as long as they can remember, so why was it when this man appeared they felt so naked and unsure in their feelings. "Uhmmm... Nigel."

"Drivolsky." He replied briskly staring once at the boy then to the girl who still hadn't found the decency to dislodge herself from the giant. He gazed back down Patton up to Rachel and full circle again. "What a surprise to see the two of you, together, at school, together. Playing together."

Finally clambering down from Patton's very popular back the girl turtled into herself before she let out a tired sigh. Nigel imagined the weight of the whole world was delegated to that sigh. Choosing not to look at him the girl turned her sights to the distance not of disdain just for fear of those unseeable eyes. A dry supple laugh escaped her mouth. She hesitated to answer and Nigel was afraid it would either be to disregard the situation or silently berate him. It was after all no secret that the two were often inseparable and no secret that as of now Patton Drivolsky and Rachel Mckenzie couldn't give a care to the world to remember Nigel beyond a fair weather friend from their youth.

The sight of the two sickened him. They made the perfect quirky date movie couple, the laid back military brat wrestler and the proficient class president. They lived right next door together and were both the subject of divorcing parents. It came to no surprise they would seek refuge in each other. He couldn't wait in another five years he would be disregarded to attend his their perfect magazine wedding. And teen years from then run into the two in a inconspicuous place to find they are living the T.V perfect life with their two point three kids in their big house with a picket fence and what the hell else the norm is now and days.

Before Nigel could muse any longer a strange alluring disposition of Rachel's frown drew his eye. It was the same frown she sent a milli-second before her secluded smile while on Drivolsky's back but a true one hundred percent baffled frown. Both Nigel and Patton followed Rachel's gaze.

The whining voice of Fanny's shouts caused Patton to stiffen somewhat all though this went unnoticed by the other two occupants. Both were screwed onto the sight of a raging Fanny arguing with a tall brown haired boy as she kicked in the side of hopefully the angry boy's pick up truck while pointing word for word with him.

The two's argument erupted into a fit of biting curses and tensing muscles. At the side of the argument a frightened Kuki pulling at the red head's sleeve as the boy lurched over the two like a full shadow. "Fanny calm down. He didn't even say anything mean. Your just overreacting" Kuki cajoled standing in the front of Fanny now. The other girl much taller pushed the five foot Asian girl out of the way of her targeted anger.

"What do you mean I'm overacting? That stupid boy has sullied the name of women everywhere! How dare he try to correct my driving!" She screamed, in the back of her mind Kuki could only wonder why she traveled with this girl when she knew Fanny was notorious for making everything in the world an insult to her honor, woman-hood and other self-righteous stigma's she developed whenever she was PMSing.

"Fanny it's not that serious." Ignoring the girl fanny got right into the boys face, at least what she could reach on her tip toes.

"This is America you ass whole! We don't want you fuckin' communistic women hating ways over here!"

In the car remained a frustrated Hoagie who buried his head in his hand damning all of them to hell or the closest corner of a fiery grave they could get. Between the two idiots shouting or more so Fanny yelling a shout out to the feminist movement and Tommy only inciting her with mean jest; he didn't think he'd make onto the school property without going through a box of smokes. Fanny's foot smashed in his head light, at this rate he might as well go home and raid his Mom's liquor stash for the strong stuff.

Within minutes a crowd had form most cheering for the angry Irish girl who was entertaining their queries by repeatedly smashing her foot into the car and at the same poking the much larger boy in the chest with her pointy finger.

Watching from across the lot the three tensed watching as what was normal Fanny behavior quickly turn rugged as the boy grabbed Fanny by her shoulder once he began to loose face. Nigel and Rachel ready to glide in to calm the situation at the moment of provocation. While Patton was bristling at the hair already running into the fray. All Drivolsky needed to see was the slight tremble of the boy's hand forming a fist as Fanny chose at the moment to slam her very heavy hand against the boy's chest to remove herself.

She flinched seeing his arm raise at her. Fear in the fearless erupted, she had never been struck by a man before- and she could admit despite her bravado in that very second she was agonizingly afraid. Her Eyes shut in defense as she waited for the strike to come. Nothing but the loud sound of back hitting metal.

Drivolsky had the shorter boy pinned to the car that lurched to the momentum of the weight his hands ready to spin the boy upside down if he had two. They were stuck in a gaze akin to fighting dogs. Looking at the other boy, Patton didn't know if he should feel afraid for there was no fear in those cloudy blue eyes.

Ready to beat each other senseless; it was then a loud clattering noise struck the pavement scaring the living hell out of every occupant present. A riding helmet lurched at the boys' feet separating the two quicker than the sight of hot lava. Dumbly Tommy picked up the helmet staring at it in a obscene way.

"You are a bunch of dumb asses." Sitting coolly on the back of the motorcycle Abigail Lincoln stared fiercely at the boys. In all her regal everyone could feel the tenseness of her posture as she pinned her hands against the seat and removed herself. Walking up to the two teens she laid her hand out in front of them, "Give Abby her helmet." Once again in a dumbness Tommy could only place the helmet as gently as she could into the girls hand. She turned her hair swaying behind her and eyes fierce, they glistened only for a moment in terrible trepidation, and she was positive only he saw. She didn't dare look back the message was made.

Abby was the kind of girl despite her coldness to draw attention. She didn't need effort- for it was all style, with raccoon eyes and frazzled hair that girl had no problems in stopping a man's heart cold with a wave of her obsidian eyes and epitome of her character. She was the classification of cool, the kind movies tried to convey. A fierceness only a born breed leader can posses. She was Abigail Lincoln the most ambiguous, most friendly, most cold and crude person one could ever come to know.

Hoagie groaned. If he had a gun he had no doubt he wouldn't hesitate to put it to his head and blow his brains out.

That was Abigail Lincoln. A rage of cold fire, always burning and always freezing. Always inviting yet volatile, frightening and unnerving. How he wished he lasted one more year he would never have to had to deal with this bullshit! "Shit, shit, shiiittttt!" He screamed banging his head against the steering wheel. "Fuck. Why do you do this to me?" He whispered as the last resonating blast of the horn impaled the infamous return of the Gilligan siblings.

To preoccupied with his self loathing Hoagie was startled at the _pit, pit_ of knocking against his window. To tired to find a reason to resent or argue Hoagie rolled down his window- all he knew is he needed the help of his friendly nicotine sticks . "You know being an ass and disturbing the whole car lot isn't going to get you a lot of brownie points. No matter how cute you are doing it"

Mumbling, "I know that."

"Then stop doing it."

"Mushi!" Kuki cried, looking incredulous at the girl who chose at that moment to deposit herself against the side of the huge foot sized dent and look blaring cold into the eyes of Hoagie Gilligan.

"What," She said flicking her nails once again refusing to acknowledge her sister. "It's the truth it's fucking annoying for all of us when there is some dumb bitch causing a ruckus just because she's mad. And once its finish everybody expects for a little of peace and quiet, but nooooooooo... Someone had to keep smashing his head into the car like freakin' self depreciating moron." She looked around at the flabbergasted face, "Don't act like that everyone was thinking it." Pushing the strap of her purse back onto her shoulder Mushi put her finger onto Hoagie's forehead. "Stop moping it annoying. "And you," She directed her manicured finger at Tommy, "get out the ninety fifties hitting women is not in style now and days it just makes you look like a douche." Called out the girl as she ran to tangle her arm into her waiting love struck boyfriend.

From the distance the group could here the valley hick swooning over the girl, "Damn I love when your so assertive." as well the disturbing whistle of said girls over mature laughter.

"Hoagie... is that you?" He didn't recognize the voice it was soft, fluttery but commanding. He imagined he heard it somewhere before. Looking up the hard amber eyes of a rather brusque looking blond woman stared at him. He knew her, but from where he couldn't recall. Leaving Kuki to tend to the shivering Fanny Patton fingers laced onto Rachel's gently stirring her away.

"We're going to be late for school." The group disappeared the sight of Kuki's distress lavender and Rachel's mournful amber gaze only caused Hoagie more stress as finally the two girls turned back around and entered the school.

Wally was beyond the definition of angry. This wasn't like someone beat him nearly to death and called his brother Joey stupid, this was like someone beat him nearly to death, spit on him, kicked him in the balls called his brother Joey stupid and made Abby cry kind of angry. He was at the very definition royally pissed- what worse his anger so sour he couldn't decipher it from his jelousy.

The sight of the Gilligan siblings had shaken Abby he was acutely aware of the fact. Right now the girl who insisted she despised coffee was on her third cup from the cafeteria just to cool her nerves. And knowing girl as cool as Abby it wasn't the coffee that was giving her the shivers.

"Hey abbs-"

She looked at him soberly from across the table, "I don't want to talk about it." Stirring her coffee in her free hand she held the other discretely to her chest trying to calm the flutter her heart heaved every time she recalled the sight of the embossed blue eyes staring right into her soul.

"But?"

"Abby told you she doesn't want to talk about it." Closing her eyes the girl tried to calm her berating the worse thing she could do now was give Wally any more chance to suspect her of vulnerability. Not that anything now could much help he already seen her have a panic attack just that morning.

Before Wally could keep up the interrogation, a blinding ball of red slammed into the seat beside him. "Whoah, uhmm. Fanny not to be rude but what the hell are you doing here?" He asked pointing at her and then the table that was in Wally's mind and unknown to Abby scribbled under the table as claimed by Wallabee Beatles and Abigail Lincoln.

"Wouldn't you like to know you stupid boy!" The girl shrieked but to Abby's observation with not the same vehemence or sincerity she usually did. She was still shaking Abby suspected from the near collision she had with Tommy but her perception skills looked even deeper. Fanny was always one to bounce back sure she had fears but she easily distracted them under her vehemence of usually Wally and any boy she denounced as an idiot.

"What's wrong?"

"What makes you think somethins' wrong?" Fanny laughed.

Flicking her hand at the table and looking around, "Cause your sitting her at our table next to Wally."

"What are you talking about me and..." Fanny swallowed the distaste in her mouth, "Wally are friends. Right Wally?"

Almost chocking on his carton of milk Wally turned to her, "Wot the hell do you mean Friends? You hate me! Wally! Wallabee Beetles! The guy who refuse to call by name! Look here sheila I don't know wot your playin' at?"

"Shud' up! You stupid boy!" Fanny screamed causing a few faces to turn in the direction.

Eyes staring around like a hawk she noticed the half anxious glaze of the wrestling captain eying the table as discretely as a boy can while talking to five of his juniors at the same time.

"It's Patton isn't it?" Abby said somewhat stunned herself once she noticed the girl's heavy blush and blustering appearance.

Laying her head down in defeat the girl clicked her heels together hoping for once in her miserable seventeen years everything could just work out like the movies, sighing she looked into the mischievous eyes of Abby. She didn't no whether to hate this girl or worship her, but one thing was for sure she would always respect her. "He's been following me all mornin' since that incident Abby. I don't know what ta' do!" Sighing dramatically into her hand the girl lounged over the table knocking Wally down in the effort. "You have to help me from girl to girl, Abby I- What should I do?"

"You'wikePaddon!" Wally shrieked his voice half muffled by the carton he held between his teeth. Embarrassed Fanny slammed the boy's carton into his face said boy pulled in his anger before standing up to strip out of his favorite jumper and retrieve a new carton of milk.

"Stupid sheila..." Wally mumbled under his breath.

"What was that Wally?" The mischevious face of Kuki grinned at said boy who only froze up stepping back from her.

"It was nothing." He responded taking flight and leaving Kuki with a forlorn frown on her face.

Drawing the conversation back in to the distracted Fanny, "Well he likes you." Abby reasoned in her nonchalant way. The girl in response gaffowed. Rolling her eyes Abby responded, "Hypothetically and only hypothetically speaking," She began gently pushing Fanny out of her space, "If Patton liked you, what would you do?"

Fanny turned red. She looked thoughtful much more than Abby had ever seen her. The red head's eyes knitted together, her brow furrowing, red lips quivering she looked so vulnerable. At the breath of the question the girl went silent she looked past Abby's shoulder in such fear and shame Abby couldn't help but turn to the source of her anguish. Fanny's head fell as moved to push the long strands of her straightened hair behind her head, "I have a boyfriend." She reminded herself, "And anyways Patton is dating Henrietta."

"Wot!" Burst out a standing Wally spitting his milk onto Fanny.

The girl's eyes watered as a series of expression flashed across her face, embarrassment, rage and sadness. "You idiot boy! I-I hate you!" The girl screamed before launching out of her seat to the unsightly voice of the other student's laughter past Rick, past Drivoskly and into the girl's locker room.

"What the hell are you staring at!" Mumbled an emotionally wounded Tommy. Looking down to the only freak who hadn't yet left to go on blubber in their futile victory. But the other just stood ram straight studying Tommy like a volatile specimen, without fear only curiosity. His eyes hidden behind a safe haven. What irked Tommy most was the way in which the boy completely ignored vising instead to shine the speckles of his sun glasses.

Riled up Tommy began to yell at the boy. Arms flailing everywhere trying to release all the pent up rage he had since encountering that stupid Fulbright girl. With a slow curdling crunch his large fist made impact with the trucks hood. The truck gurgled sputtering out smoke from the collapsed hood. All to sudden the engine spurred and to quickly the engine died. Hoagie who was in combat with his inner self felt a proverbial knife get jabbed into his lung, jumping out of the car he ran to the hood and tried to pry it open. But it came to no avail the smoke only rose higher from the spurning truck laughing at the poor boys misfortune.

"My baby!" Hoagie cried. "Why?" He screamed removing his hands from the overheating hood. He grabbed at his hair a rage of frustration so powerful it caused both Nigel and Tommy to take a large step back. He calmed so suddenly it was inhuman. Placing his hands on to dead cars grill he leaned his body against it staring once at what was left of his car and then up into the coldness of the dead clouds up above him.

He turned, looking at Tommy with a vehemence so powerful it caused a chill to ran down Nigel's spine. The coldness of the boys eyes clearer than the broadest lake stared at his own blood. "You Killed my car," He growled. This wasn't Hoagie, not the Hoagie Nigel remembered. This boy; this man he was volatile, angst and set in wave of anger. He looked no more like Hoagie then he acted. Watching in hesitation Nigel wearily noticed the boys hand grip and grasp at thin air frustrated as he slammed his foot into the grill and silenced the poor truck once and for all.

"Hoagie?"

"Just go away." He wasn't angry at this point just tired. Tired with life, school; everything- anything he wasn't sure anymore. His voice sounded dead and half pleading at the same time as he repeated his request. Hoagie walked away tossing his backpack over his shoulder before trudging the opposite way of the school to clear his head.

Gritting his teeth Tommy called after him, "Where are you going?"

A haze of smoke filtered from the boys mouth as he slipped the freshly lit cigarette from his mouth, "To smoke."

Raddled and somewhat betrayed Tommy stared at his unannounced companion studying his features for the first time. He didn't want his first day of school to be a horrible ruin despite his horrible run in with Fanny two seconds before he stepped foot onto the parking lot he was assured he could at least make one companion. And hell if he would even put effort into it. He will do, Tommy decided looking at the boy in front of him. He was a gangly sort just an inch shy of Tommy's own height but definitely lacked any muscle or physique he just looked stickish. He was obviously bald for the sides of his head easily gleamed under his woolen cap. To his own Tommy thought trying to ignore the bizarreness of the creature before him after all his attire screamed self-righteous prick but who was he to judge; a long turtle neck boot leg jeans, an expensive arm watch and those damnable black shades- black shades?

Tommy thought pulling the image together, he could almost laugh. The unchangeable:

"Nigel Uno."

**And that is the end of this chapter guys I hope you enjoyed it. If anyone didn't understand none of the kids remember being kids next door agents beside Nigel at the moment. I just wanted to let you know I'm not picking on Fanny deliberately pretty much every character will have their bad day and I mean some really bad days she's just the first one to get the plot going warning her bad day is far from over. **

**This story is a hoagie and abby but there are other pairings please don't be surprised or flame me if a character is in a relationship with someone you don't think they should be I have a feeling this may be a long story and there are going to be a lot of bumpy roads and a lot of unclear feelings and relationship. In the end I will deliver what ever relationships I feel do justice to this particular story.**

**I hope you guys enjoy this chapter I'll try not to be such a stranger I have a feeling I will be writing soon I have a month holiday off from school so... if I don't update before Christmas feel free to badger me but just in case, merry Christmas guys- and a happy new year!**


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